Prosciutto Funghi

mogekocastle

One thing that I was enjoying for sure during my university years in the big city was the variety of good food that I could stuff my mouth full of. Where I live currently – my home town – there is pretty much nothing good here! In general, I tend to go for fast foods and junk snacks, but I tell you, even if I brought myself up to actually cook, there are no any good ingredients whatsoever that you can buy in this mountain hell of a town!

There was that one pancake hut, which I really liked when I lived in the big city. It was the kind of “New type of pancakes EVERYDAY” and I really liked the spicy ones. I’ve never eaten spicy pancakes up until then, my beloved mother would usually serve them plain or with pine honey and nuts. Sometimes with strawberry jam. Depends. The thing is, I can’t go below twenty pancakes once I start eating ’em, but the hut had quite the nasty prices. One pancake only never manages to fill in the void of my stomach, no matter how tasty it might be! Maybe what really matters when it comes to pancakes is the quantity, rather than the actual quality? – In my case that’s it. Maybe if I had a cooking robot, that question could have been answered quite easily…

Mogeko Castle 1.1 DONE!

There was also that one pizza place where you can order up from. The delivery service was pretty good, I would usually wait up to ten minutes, fifteen during the winter. Always got the warm box, never managed to get rid of the bloody olives! No matter how much I gently asked beforehand during the order, my pizza would always have five to six freaking olives on top. Oh, you better believe I threw those away! Point at me, get angry if you will – I hate olives! I hate their smell, I hate their taste and I would never consider them to be an actual food, let alone part of a pizza!

I don’t remember how the place was called though. I would guess, “Underaged Fisting”. Their sauces and especially the cream cheese were pretty great. I made the mistake of ordering a pizza with chilli peppers once, barely managed to get past half of it. No, removing the chilli peppers didn’t solve anything! Their taint remains and can’t be removed at all! If I was feeling suicidal enough, I could have shoved them all inside my mouth, along with the olives I didn’t order. I had hope for tomorrow though, a hope I call milk. Milk is a pretty good hope! Their Pizza Margherita is pretty costly though, obviously made with the idea of being affordable by families and not by single customers.

The Prosciutto Funghi is probably the best pizza in the universe though! Talk about quality meat and the pleasure of tasting some of the most delicious mushrooms from glorious eastern Europe! All warpped in melting cream cheese, tasty sauce and the olives go into the trash can yet again! Truly, the only thing that managed to ruin my experience from eating this universal meal was the delivery guy, who tried to keep the change that one time. No! I could not allow it. You can’t just assume you can do something without my word on it. We are not talking about saving the world or delivering a baby here, we are talking about doing your job at delivering a pizza! Was I supposed to allow that as within the idea that I was satisfied with the service? Well, I guess I can never be satisfied. It’s not about actual facts happening, it’s about me accepting them. And guess what, I am not doing that! He was rich enough in the first place to own a car and use it for his job, I’m sure he’ll be fine without my money that I used to buy the biggest bag of potato chips the next day.

Anyways…

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Gyossait + [The Hunt] – The Gods quarrel and the mechanical idea behind the butter blocks

gyossait

Both “Gyossait” and “The Hunt” were gifted to me by Amon26 [The author of these fantastic titles! /spoiler], as a token of appreciation for saving his home from 592 Devil Boy game cartridges, all of which I have managed to successfully exorcise and put on sale at my garage!

Recently, I’ve covered two other titles from Amon26 – “Au Sable” and “All of Our Friends Are Dead”, wherein I’ve been left with a pretty good impression regarding the author’s work. “Gyossait” is quite similar in structure and gameplay to those two, though there are improvements in almost every aspect, from level design to visuals and whatnot. The huge impact within’ the game itself compared to Amon26’s previous works comes from the main protagonist, whom the player controls – Oyeatia, a God who decided to leave behind all his power and money, for the sake of going down to the earth realm in search for a goddess – Gyossait. The two have things to settle, feelings of love are at work, the usual Amon26’s vibe and style, Emmy awarding – last slice of the pizza badge, I’m glad I played this before I had to pay my taxes. No, let’s put the plot aside and look at the character from the gameplay perspective. His main tool of trade is a SHIELD! While its only purpose is to deflect bullets, I still find it pretty cool, given how rarely you get to see a character with this setup in video games. [ Like Olaf from “The Lost Vikings” and… Well, I guess Oyeatia and Olaf are the best shield- based- wielding-only  characters in video games that I know of and I find them to be pretty rad. There is Captain America too, but I am not a fan of his shield technique and I REALLY dislike that one NES game with him – Truly, those are two SOLID reasons alright!] While in the early part of “Gyossait” you’ll be playing mostly on the defensive side, at a certain point you are given a second tool – a gun. The gun replaces the shield and let’s you go on the offensive side, which potentially makes certain enemies and areas a bit easier to be dealt with. HOWEVER, one should be aware of how important gun control is, less they are willing to accept and deal with potential consequences that may or may not ultimately satisfy their expectations. I think that having the player play around or stick with a certain tool is a pretty good way of making a video game feel interesting and different in terms of gameplay, all in all while keeping the general level layout intact. It also enhances the replay value quite well! This game shows a pretty good example regarding that matter…

Gyossait DONE!

Look, yes! This game is yet another sea full of visually interesting and unique areas, enemies, NPCs, bosses and whatnot, along with the usual well- crafted flow of progression. BUT… what I am about to reveal to you are TWO major faults within’ this title that go towards the point of even making it UNPLAYABLE! I also realize now that this silly, joke statement contains a bit of truth to it… OH NO!

“Gyossait” has them key puzzles, non- puzzles parts too. Losing a key in the game is more generous than from past titles though, as the game tends to keep its location at the place of your death, rather than spawning it back at its starting location. SOMETIMES if you lose a key and it falls in a death pit of death or a drink, the game might get so disappointed by your performance, it might choose to not spawn the key back at the nearest safe- land land and instead – disintegrate it completely, which gets you stuck forever and you’ll have to restart the whole game…

There is also the addition of puzzles where you have to push blocks. The way those blocks move when they are pushed feels pretty weird, like they slide on ice. What’s even more weird is that once you step on them, your whole moving momentum changes and you slip- slide all over their surface. I had the unfortunate experience to slide off one near the end of the game and dive right into the death juice. For some reason that was during my second run of the game and it was then when I realized that they were coated in all- natural butter. I was quite upset about that death, which made me forgot about a well- placed enemy nearby. Once I got back to where I died and I jumped off the butter block, I was shot by the rude foe, which sent me back right into the drink. At that moment, I was ready to cry and call the police, but little did I knew, that the whole thing was an actual setup by the author, so the player can get that >(one)< silly achievement! Truly, a master- tier game design was at work!

The Hunt DONE!

“The Hunt” is a FPS, “Au Sable” spinoff, where you take on the role of a [hunter]. It’s pretty short, composed only of two fairly small levels. What I like about it is the unsettling atmosphere, to which the sound contributes greatly! We are not talking about the usual crap with dull screams or monster snores, we are talking about unique sound composition, on- spot along with pretty spicy visuals. Let me tell you about the actual selling point here – You go through the dark woods, you enter the shadowy ruins, all sorts of freaky things jump at you, but it’s alright since holding space bar destroys the world and everything in sight! During this whole time, your ears orgasm under the heavenly sonata by eldritch abominations from sector Z-27 to  dimensional plane 004-BH, until SUDDENLY your eyes spot upon the ultimate aspect of the game…

… the exploding Amon26’s barrels!

In conclusion

LR19 Spooky Mystery Video Games Mixer!

mixer

This is the first and potentially not the last post where I talk about five games that I’ve played for the new Halloween- themed volume. What is October to you? To me, October is the month where I hide inside my room during the cold weather and shove all the poached pears in the world inside my abyssal mouth. Spook times!!!

Basketball Nightmare [Sega Master System]

Basketball Nightmare DONE!

The only enjoyable thing in this game to me were the animated cutscenes that play during the slam dunks. Indeed, they are pretty rough and stiff, but I find them charming nevertheless. The overall gameplay feels like a watered- down “Tecmo NBA Basketball [NES]”, where you can also stand in front of your active opponent, which stops them right in their tracks, either until they realize half a minute later that the ball can be passed down or you steal it from them. There is quite the weird RNG when it comes to successful shots, regardless of their range! I liked the variety of the monster teams that you get to play against in the story mode. However, playing and beating each of them ends up being quite the boring task and I have no idea how I did it on my first try! Wait, I do! I kept blocking their active players!

Drac’s Night Out [NES]

Drac's Night Out 1.1 DONE!

You are Drac and you have to go out on a date with this one girl each day, for five times in a row! Every round, you have to exit your home first and then find the house where the girl lives. Exiting your home is pretty challenging, given that it gets invaded by villagers constantly. Lucky you though, you can activate traps or call for the help of various monsters. If a villager is hurt, you can consume them for blood [HP] and you transform once you’ve accumulate enough of them. Once you transform, you turn into a bat, which lets you go through a part of the level fairly quickly, ignoring all danger and whatnot. There is also a fall damage and shoes that you can collect which grant you speed and the ability to jump over wide gaps, villagers, traps and something that I didn’t knew until I finished the game was that you can jump on villagers to stun them! The house is divided by five sections and for each round, you have to exit through the door on the lowest floor, on the same section you woke up. On each new round, Drac wakes up at a different location on the highest floor. During your descend, you are free to go to other sections, which is also a key element at certain times. As the rounds go by, some traps and monsters can harm you as well and the villagers speed and invasion pace increases by a bit. Here’s few hints from me:

/ You can jump over rolling rocks and wheels if you are close enough to them and time your jump well./ [Without shoes!]

/Careful when you transition to the first section of the house on round two, as it is possible to get stuck quite early, but I guess you can [EAT] your way out of it. [?]/

/At the start of round three, to avoid fall damage when you transition to section four, you can start your jump from section three./

/The light switch needed to remove the darkness in round four is located two floors below you, on the left. It’s quite safe and easy to access, but it took ME a while to find it! At the start, I went as far as to play half of the section in complete darkness…/

/Grinding villagers for transformation can save you lots of time, mainly doing annoying transitioning from one section of the house to another and dealing with hordes of pesky villagers. There is also a switch towards the end of round five which you can access easily as a bat, rather than trying to go for the shoes and learn the platforming momentum, which will cost you a few falls./

Drac's Night Out 1.2 DONE!

The second part of the game takes a different turn from the early platforming and puts you into a top- down perspective. As Drac, now you have to locate the house of the girl, which of course is done by asking/ consuming people for directions and items. The early rounds are quite generous as they provide you with a map and the bridges in town are still intact. Later rounds, the game make you find a map from a merchant and the bridges are removed. How important those factors are depends entirely on the girl’s location, which is always randomly generated. You know, given that she is the only lady in town that can afford to dress in plain, semi- dark blue [?], it’s obvious that she comes from a rich family that probably owns half the town. There is also now the classic mob with pitchforks and torches, which are sadly, an instant GAME OVER for Drac if they come into contact with him. While I do think that the time limit within’ the game and Drac’s HP meter are quite generous, getting stuck on a path between two mob groups is probably one of the worst feelings in the video game universe, especially on later rounds, ESPECIALLY if you are going for a no- death run… Here’s be hints from me:

/As houses have both front and back exits, the same applies to entrances! I know, it’s amazing! Few people would be willing to enter through a door they can’t see though…/

/Need to cross the river but bridges are out? Trapdoors inside some houses can lead you across. You just need to find the correct houses!/

/Mob groups are the worst thing in the universe, but they can’t harm you during your transformation. [In this part, Drac transforms into a dog/ or wolf???] Pick up some shoes to boost your speed up even further during your transformation and you’ll be flying through half the town in now time! [Not really, but still, the feeling is pretty great!]

Scooby-Doo: Curse of Anubis – Pyramid of Doom!

Scooby-Doo - Curse of Anubis - Pyramid of Doom! DONE!

I was never all that big of a fan on the whole Scooby- Doo series. I remember watching a few episodes, back in the days, simply because there wasn’t anything else, more interesting, running at the time. So do I remember. At that time, the kids in my school would go crazy over the series for some reason, making conversations and topics about it for the whole day. When I was asked about my opinion, I would state that I have no interest in things that are not/related to] video games and at the time, our country wasn’t big on importing any Scooby-Doo games whatsoever.    [?]

“Scooby-Doo: Curse of Anubis – Pyramid of Doom!” is a flash game that I picked randomly a few days ago. It features and isometric view and pushing block elements, along with a limit regarding how many steps you can make. The goal is to reach the exit door in each room. Blocks serve as a mere obstacles and are not required for a specific arrangement. The ten levels that I played felt pretty decent. Maybe there could have been more, with additional gimmicks? It took me two tries to complete the game with what I assume is the highest possible score?

The thing about the game is that you have limit on your steps, not an actual time limit. Thus, you can take your time to plan your path ahead quite well. The whole isometric perspective might add a bit of a weird feeling to it, but it’s nothing too complicated really.

Scooby-Doo Mystery [Sega Genesis]

Scooby-Doo Mystery 1.1 DONE!

Scooby-Doo as an adventure game was a fairly satisfying experience. One can argue as to how it can’t match other titles in the genre of the time in terms of visuals and ESPECIALLY sound, but as a whole, I personally had no problems with any of those. The game features two chapters which are pretty short, but there is enough puzzle- solving and exploring to satisfy even the veterans of the High Mountain Adventure Game Club Dragon Breath VII. Some items are quite well hidden, so I suggest looking carefully and interacting with things in many ways as possible. There are no dead ends or bullshit- logic at hand, which is nice. Not always, but as a whole, quite nice. If you are in the mood for some casual and comfy adventure game, featuring the two blockheads from the Scooby-Doo series, you are in for quite the ride!

I like how the game gives you indirect hints/ direction through Scooby, who follows you around everywhere. You even get to interact with him at a certain, single, one point! It’s a nice little touch, but I liked it quite a lot.

Scooby-Doo Mystery 1.2 DONE!

Sweet Home [NES]

Sweet Home 1.5 DONE!

This is a survival- horror, top- down perspective game that I’ve put on a hold even since I learned about it around 2009. I saw it first on some forums, then I briefly saw some LPs, it was suggested to me by friends and foes, by my own self and eventually, there it is! 2017, Halloween blast baby, “Sweet Home”…    IS REALLY SWEET! Man, I really do regret not playing it sooner…

Sweet Home 1.4 DONE!

In the game, you take control of five people, who get locked inside an old mansion – house- building, which turns out to be haunted. Finding an exit and learning more about the ghost who locked you up are your main priorities, as well as trying to keep as many members of your party alive as possible.  You can control each person separately or you can put them into groups of up to three people. Each character has their own special thing, like one can open locked doors with a key, other can cure ill- stats, burn ropes and so on. If someone dies, you lose on their special item, but that doesn’t mean that you’ll get stuck! There are additional items that can replicate the effect of the special item that the death member possessed. There is a maid in the game and I really liked that, since you don’t see those often in games like this, especially with the power to ACTUALLY clean garbage and open new paths! Honestly, the whole cast of the game is pretty awesome, despite how simple and generic they might seem at first sight.

Sweet Home 1.2 DONE!

Each character has a limited inventory space, so a few reasons to keep as many people alive as possible are to keep items organized and to avoid needless backtracking. There are quite a lot of items within, the game – Some are needed to open new paths, other are needed for solving a certain puzzle. There is also an item which restores HP and WEAPONS! That’s right! Apart from just going around the house, collecting items and solving stuff, you also get to FIGHT! Randomly generated encounters put the lovely cast of “Sweet Home” against some pretty neat foes! Not so neat in terms of names, but visually, every enemy in “Sweet Home” I found to be pretty cool. Spooky cool!

Sweet Home 1.3 DONE!

You get experience from fighting enemies, which makes your characters stronger, up to a maximum level of 20. The battles are easier when done in a big group of three and with acquiring better weapons. While you don’t need to level up every character in the game, you do need at least three or two of them to be tough enough to face further encounters and the boss of the game. Having all your characters leveled up and well equipped lets you move them more freely, potentially dealing with encounters easily and using them from whatever part of the game you might need them. I think that Emi and Akiko are pretty important during the whole course, as locked doors and ill- stats are the things most presented within’ the game. Thus, having them leveled up and geared well is a good strategy for a successful run.

Sweet Home 1.1 DONE!

Leveling up comes naturally and no actual grinding is needed as you progress. I like how rewarding leveling up and obtaining good weapons is, to the point where it makes your group virtually untouchable by attacks from normal encounters. The logic behind the puzzles is pretty solid and easy to follow. There are two VERY WELL hidden items, which I didn’t managed to find until after I finished the game. Honestly though, they are not all that great, not game- breaking at all! More like optional, depending on how much free inventory space you can afford, really.

Playing this game, I could see how it managed to inspire various series and titles that came years after it. “Sweet Home” was like a grand feast, but I’m full. Full, full! Not just nap time- full. Damn! What a good game!

All Of Our Friends Are Dead + Au Sable – flow /

ausable

“All Of Our Friends Are Dead” and “Au Sable” are games made by Amon26, both, fairly similar in concept – yet, pretty unique from one another. Each one shares its own portion of platforming and action, wherein in “Au Sable” you follow the story of a girl and in “All Of Our Friends Are Dead” you are put in the shoes[?] of a thing that’s not a girl! There is an overall abstract composition on which both titles ride along, which I really enjoyed, among other things as well. You know how I tend to not mention anything about the music when I write about video games? That’s either because I didn’t find it appealing or I didn’t even notice it due to the way – more overwhelming gameplay. While I could say that both games here managed to balance that issue, there is a bit more to the overall structure…

Both “Au Sable” and “All Of Our Friends Are Dead” are pretty short in terms of playtime. In addition, there is also the generous factor that lets the player save/load anywhere within’ the games. Enemies come in quite the variety – From wriggling red squids and fire-breathing mutants[?] to various abominations from class A to B, each with their own randomized movements and attack patterns. They all die in few shots and pose a treat only when in large numbers. That being said, getting hit by a red squid that falls from the top of the screen, in a sudden and unexpected manner, is pretty rude! Various different bosses are also to be encountered in both games, each with its own pattern,design and a fight that usually last for less than a minute! The platforming segments are of average difficulty, where the main factors for a failure are badly timed jumps or vision- obscured enemies falling on you from the top of the screen. I don’t know why I’m still bringing up the those squids… For things to spice up a bit, there is also the addition of puzzle segments – In “All Of Our Friends Are Dead” you get to find keys and bring them to doors, while in “Au Sable” you get two “eyes” for companions, which trace down your movements and you need to use that knowledge to make them activate buttons or eliminate that one enemy type. It all sound so simple and easy, eh?

Everything mentioned above sums up to the flow of the games, which is their actual bread n’ butter of success. Whether you casually play games and you tend to struggle with certain aspects or you are the game Pro+ , no save/load, no death, no limbs, no eyes playthrough, these two games push you towards progress in one way or another. Be it the constant- growing learning curve or the generous checkpoints, in the end, you’ll arrive at the goal with intact mindset, keeping track of what things where and have become. Music, visuals, sounds, they are all put together in a fashion that make you see and feel, with the gameplay scraping away the rest of your strawberry jam. Now, you are to enjoy the plain, crusty layer of your plain toast… OH, HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN SINCE YOU LAST TRIED IT???

All of Our Friends Are Dead DONE!

Perhaps, the only issue that I see in “All Of Our Friends Are Dead” and “Au Sable” is their diminishing replay value. Even when it comes to additional exploration or getting a certain [second] ending, the true magic lies only in the handful of initial playthroughs. Various bugs and glitches are aslo present in the games, but honestly, you have to go way out of the expectation boundaries for them to occur, thus, they are but a nonexistent minus factor for the enjoyment of these games.

85 out of 10!!!

Free Fetus!

free fetus

From volume 327 of “True hell under the vast sea” called [ To wake up with your right sock missing!]:

My earliest memory of “True hell under the sea” was probably when I was in first grade. I remember that my grandmother gave me something that I had to bring to my mother at her workplace. While the whole travel distance takes between 5 to 10 minutes, I had to pass through a place with various ruined and desolated buildings, followed by a big park. However, this time it was different! A family of Gypsies had moved to one of the buildings. Their kids, three young boys – one around my age and the other two a bit older than me, where sitting on a bench, discussing god knows whatever crap. They didn’t saw me at first and I was honestly hoping that I could slip by unnoticed. Where I live, Gypsies are commonly associated with crimes, from simple thievery to rape and even murder. Age for them is but a nonexistent restriction for committing any of those! Things haven’t really changed on their end since back then… Anyways, a few seconds after I passed by them, the oldest one stood up and started walking towards me. A sudden surge of fear raced through my body. Looking at the boy’s visage, I could feel and tell that he was up to no good. My walking pace gradually became running. I was running towards my mother’s workplace through the park, with tears pouring down my cheeks. The Gypsy chased me down all the way to my destination! Even though I managed to outrun my pursuer and find a safe shelter, he still waited for me outside for more than half an hour! If there is one thing that I am really glad for is the fact that I wasn’t caught that day, otherwise who knows how that traumatic experience could have been further enhanced…

Covetous 1.1 DONE!

“Covetous” can barely be called an actual game! It tells a story of an undeveloped twin- fetus who resides in his…brother, ultimately making you help him eat its way out to freedom… or not! It’s a one- time hit really and even then, I was a bit disappointed from the finale. The game pretty much plays itself, wherein your contribution resides in playing flushed down version of a fetus- Pac – Man.

From volume 295 of “True hell under the vast sea” called [ Duh, who put the lights out?]:

“Fear is the first of many foes” – A wise champion character from a certain MOBA once said. Actually, he says it all the time, but this next thing happened before I even got into the whole lane wars trend. It was a month before my graduation from High School, before the [BIG] exams… I was walking down a street on my way to go and visit my poor, lonely grandma, who if anything, disliked late night visits, especially ones that occur after 9.00 PM. The weather that night was breezy, but overall, enjoyable. Armed with my phone, loaded with over 30 tracks, from anime and classic music, to random garbage that would cause a normal person’s ears to bleed, I noticed something in the distance in front of me. Three guys, casually walking and loudly blabbing. Since it was nighttime, I had quite some trouble recognizing them and besides, I had the tendency to not wear my glasses outside. One of them was a person with whom I had history back in grade school, wherein for no reason he crouched and fist-smacked me in my balls, no holding back whatsoever. He was also known among others for being violent, beating the crap out of people for his own amusement, young girls where gossiping about his tendency to intimidate young females and force them to perform oral sexual services in return for their own safety. Yes! This same person was about to cross paths with me yet again, with me being in quite the unfavorable position of one to three. The moment we came to cross paths, he jumped and screamed at me like an animal, followed by laughter from his own mouth and the ones of his comrades. He didn’t cared about my reaction, he only cared about the satisfaction of having no restrains and doing whatever the hell he wanted. On my end, I stood still and I said something of the sort of “What the hell is your problem?”, followed by me retaining my position and just starring in disapproval at them. A moment later, they have already taken their places to surround me and until the sudden surge of panic managed to wash over my mind, I already found myself lying on the ground, being kicked from all sides. My mouth was a gushing waterfall of blood, my jaw – a nightmare from beyond space and time. After a while, they got bored of kicking me and left. I stood up and proceed towards my grandma’s place. Upon arrival I was greeted with: “What happen? What did that horrible dentist did to you this time?!?” from her side. I had a horrible dentist back then…

There was a severe judgement coming from the local police station for my attackers afterwards, though unsatisfying from my own point of view. I retained a scar and acquired the knowledge to try and avoid being in an unfavorable position of a lonely, late- night traveler.

Free Icecream DONE!

If there is something in particular that I can say about “Free Ice Cream”, it would be that there isn’t any Ice Cream at all! In fact, you get to face various horrible things, from a butcher who can barely speak to having to kill a cat and watch it defecate all over the floor afterwards, along with the most horrible thing of all – Having to fix the electricity for your only escape – A stair elevator! Overall, this game is far away from the likes of “Samorost” in terms of pretty much everything, but it’s still fine to the extend of a single playthrough.

Avoid humans! Ignore humans! Hide from humans! Report to the local mini- market for any human sightings! HU –/ ll , – NS???