Totsugeki Masui Shoujo Alice [PC-98] – Needle on the path

Syringe

A lot of medical tools tend to look pretty grotesque and disturbing. The mere sight of them tend to fuel our imagination with excess ideas of an outcome that would cause us an unimaginable amount of pain, once said tool is put into use. However, in reality, the actual case usually ends up being that you feel little to nothing… I’ve recently had a really messy visit at the dentist, where it took a while for my tooth to get pulled out. For how bloody and unusually painful it was, it still didn’t reach THAT point of uncomfortable experience that my mind fantasized about earlier, before the visit. Perhaps medicine has advanced to a point where one can be always at ease regardless of how extreme the situation is… or maybe I just grew up? … [?]

“Totsugeki Masui Shoujo Alice” is one of the best “Pipe Dream” clones that I’ve ever played!

Still, RNG can screw you up majorly if the game doesn’t decide to give you the proper pieces, especially in later stages where the field is already filled with paths and there are few empty spots where you can discard.

While the game doesn’t have a direct answer to this issue, it offers others that makes things a bit more tolerable. One of them is the addition of 1- ups that you can collect. While they require a bit of additional work for you to collect them, a stage containing one usually means that you don’t have to worry about failing it, as long as you collect the extra life beforehand. Another thing is that instead of having to deal with a flow of liquid that slowly fills up the space and the path that you created, your only concern here is the main character Alice, who can move freely as long as there is a proper path set for her. Backtracking is an option and in some stages a key element for success. You can also make Alice move faster, which is pretty important for stages with tight time limit, which are usually the result of the player being forced to place path pieces on one another, as the game is forcing the lose time intentionally. These stages are the only pain in the butt, but there are things that you can do to prevent consecutive losses. Trying to discard as less pieces as possible is a no- brainer, yet again, it is still quite affected by the RNG. Don’t place pieces that would drain the timer near the goal if Alice has still a way to go! Wait for her to get closer, then after placing the piece, just fire her up to go as fast as possible. There are items that can refill your time meter, but they also require some additional path building to be obtained… usually.

( I really like how the level designer/s put items out of reach to tease the player. You don’t see that kind of design usually, but I still find it quite charming when I do, even if the joke does not have that much of a high impact.)

The game has a decent difficulty curve. It paces between throwing hard and easy levels at you, but in general, it’s quite low in difficulty overall. There is a save and stage select feature as well! If you are looking for a great adult content, this one offers only nudity, with one of the girls being on a plain, boring black background for some reason. Either there was a blackout or she was hiding in a basement, one can only wonder as to why that is as it is.

Personally, I am quite satisfied with this game. If you are wondering what do syringes have to do with this game, I guess it’s the main character’s weapon of choice, which she uses against a guy/s…? [?] You do have to collect one before finishing every 5th stage or else… you just can’t enter the house and a life is lost instead if you try to do so.

Don’t ignore a need for a syringe! Vaccinate today!

🍇 Nanoha Snake 🍇

nanohapotat

I remember watching the Nanoha series around… a decade ago or so. I also remember dropping the show for a while halfway through the first season, because I found it to be incredibly boring. Then I came back to it an year later to finish it, along with the other seasons, only to be left completely unsatisfied in the end. Around that time I’ve seen many other series in the magical girl genre and I’ve come to realize that if it’s not a parody or has a high substance of comedy bits, it just doesn’t appeal to me whatsoever.

But the thing with the magical girl shows is that they have pretty memorable characters, usually due to their colorful and detailed design. It’s quite common for one to end up liking the characters without much care for the quality of the actual franchise. I’ve met once with a person who said that they’ve watched all of Nanoha’s seasons and the conversation never went beyond that. They did liked Nanoha’s character because of her being a cute magical girl and… that’s it. Leave to the cute appeal to cover for the blandness!

Here we have “Nanoha Snake”, a flash game, clone of the classic “Snake” . As far as those go, I think this one is kind of alright. There are two modes – The first one is a bit slower in terms of progress and it requires a good snake management in terms of your overall increasing size. In the second one the snake moves a bit faster and you also progress so as well, but it’s nothing all too complicated. I was at the age of three when I played my first snake clone on the highest speed, which was faster than what you have in this mode. God bless bootleg handhelds… The speed in the first mode increases as well, but not all that much. It’s generous enough in consideration to the fact that you have to manage a snake that grows almost half the screen size.

After eating enough grapes, a bar fills up and Nanoha loses her clothes gradually. Once you fill the bar on any of the two modes, a CG mode can be accessed where Fate makes appearance as well, though she cannot be undressed… [?]

I find the first mode to be way more challenging and entertaining, but if you are too desperate to undress Nanoha, just do the second mode. I’m sure that will satisfy your nostalgic feelings of growing up with this bland- ass show, just as mine were satisfied with playing a decent game of snake.

BodyConQuest I: Abakareshi Musume Tachi [FDS] – Touch a dragon, feel a dragon

bodycon

I want to go on an adventure where I bump and hump my enemies through battles, while beheading their commanders with my stainless steel body. Where women would undress for my entertainment, just because I have a conversation with them. A world, where the only woman in which I have interest would refuse to show me her ass, no matter what I do, even if I saved said world from a certain demise. That’s BodyConQuest for the FDS! The first ever RPG in which I had the pleasure to experience combat that revolves around colliding with your foes and boy it’s… pretty fun.

As far as the actual adult content in this game goes, the most you are going to get out of it is full nudity and not much else. I didn’t even knew before my second playthrough that you unlock additional scenes by talking more and more with some of the girls. The plot of the game is actually pretty alright and to a certain point it feels more rewarding to get and experience the sweet ending, rather than just looking at wenches meat flesh.

The game is pretty simple and easy. Just run into things to kill them, level up, get stronger, traverse plain and boring dungeons, get loot! Equipment is especially important in this game in order to be able to deal with stronger enemies, so make sure to check every shop and every corner of every dungeon for a potential higher tier item. You don’t need much grinding in order to progress. Maybe spending 5 to 10 minutes on each new type of enemies would be a good idea, just to be on the safe side, if that’s your thing. There is a key that you can miss if you don’t find and walk on the right spot on the overworld map, but all it does is let you speak to the locked hermit guy, who just tells you a hint for a puzzle thing that I managed to solve by myself. It also unlocks a shortcut to an area, which you don’t really need… Bosses are pretty easy, just aim for the head and make sure you are geared properly. Otherwise, there isn’t much more to this game. It’s a simple, fun and quite enjoyable game. It won’t blow your mind, nor will you be able to blow your load, but it’s quite suitable for a late afternoon tea break.

Bodycon DONE!

I forgot to mention that there are also spells in this game, each of which, from the start, is overpowered enough to further ensure your success. The music didn’t strike me as something grand, but it was quite nice nevertheless.

Maybe one day I’ll play the sequel. They say it’s pretty tough, but hey! I managed to learn how to properly wash a table cloth with the cleaner, I don’t see how can anything else in this universe be more challenging than that!