RA Invasion [Part 6] – Invade! Lazy Invader

croc

Not a very exciting RA weekend. Rather than playing, I spent most of my time lying on bed and thinking about games that I don’t want to play, along with my constant dreaded thought of “What if tomorrow something destroys the Earth? Everything Humanity worked so hard for over generations would be put to waste.” It’s not the best mood for one to be hanging on, but sometimes there are moments where we can’t shake off certain feelings, no matter if we managed to come in terms with them over the years of our growth.

Croc [Game Boy Color]

Alright, maybe there would be at least one good thing to our total obliteration – There will be no more “Croc” for the Game Boy Color and none of us will be tortured by this game anymore!

So this version of Croc is a 2D platformer. I do not know how well does Croc fare in his original 3D platformer games, but in this one he just sucks ass. The jumping is very fast and sharp. While moving and attacking an enemy, if you manage to defeat them, Croc won’t stop in his tracks, but rather, continue on for a while. Avoid doing that on baddies located near pitfalls! When it comes to said enemies, the hit detection is really awful. In contrast to these problems (/), the game answers with two easy solutions – Bland level design with low difficulty and extra lives everywhere! By everywhere, I mean that at the end of the game, I was already maxed out! One major issue for those who would want to lose a portion of their minds and go for a full clear of this game are the mini- games at the end of each level. You see, each level has these critters that you need to find and rescue, hidden all over the place. However, each level has one of them being the reward for completing the mini- game at the end, to which you only have access if you find all the BONUS letters! Those aren’t really all that well hidden, similar to the critters, but in case you fail to complete a certain mini- game, you’ll have to redo said level all over again! The most troublesome of the bunch is the sliding puzzle mini- game. The rest are fairly easy, though during your first introduction to them, you might find yourself being at disadvantage due to lack of knowledge regarding how does each one control or play.

Your health is represented by the collectable crystals, which grant you an extra life per each 100th. While that is fine and dandy, given that the game showers you with extra lives, you might be more interested in just keeping the number of the crystals high enough so you can tank through stuff, rather than reset the number for a mere 1- UP. The extra life would be meaningless anyways if you die a dozen of times after that, due to being unable to hold your ground against the enemies, who tend to move pretty fast and come off screen in a blast!

The reward for finding all critters is pretty lame, as the game just gives you access to all the mini- games that you’ve played… Wow!

Some of the bosses in this game are OK. They require a bit of thought and direct approach isn’t usually the answer. Even if you lose all your crystals to them, there is a small section before each boss that provides you with some for the fight. I think that the amount is fair enough, as it doesn’t give you all that much extra hits. However, there is still the issue with one reaching the boss with high amount of crystals carried over from another level. But hey! If you feel like this game is challenging for your own personal level, sure, why not?

I really, really hated the mine- cart section! Not the first time I’ve been disappointed by that type of level in a video game though!

Hammerin’ Harry: Ghost Building Company [Game Boy]

Hammerin' Harry - Ghost Building Company DONE!

A very fun action platformer, quite easy in general in terms of difficulty, though there are a few kinda’ tough parts that require a bit of learning. Also, featuring a boss that provides you with enough extra lives and health until you are full, right before the final level! That sure is something I’ve never seen before in a game and I am enjoying this idea quite a lot, especially given that the final level is not really a walk in the park, at least not on your first initial run.

I like how the plot is represented as a movie in a cinema, where people are watching the events unfold. Gen-san Harry has to save his girlfriend from all sorts of Ghosts ‘n Goblins this time around, which… managed to fit in with the whole construction theme quite well. You get to fight a haunted giant Nail, demolish a ghost blimp, part by part and eventually, bring destruction to the ghost making machine itself. Of course, given that this is a [HORROR] themed game, at the end it is revealed that EVIL NEVER DIES!

It’s quite an entertaining twist of events and it made me think about how silly this type of endings are in actual horror movies. Despite the fact that I’ve seen those a billion times, I don’t find them boring or outdated to this day.

But the machine keeps reviving ghosts and the game doesn’t really comes to a halt… I wonder if there is a secret to it that no one has found yet? Maybe a certain combination of buttons could unlock a secret New Game + or something? I highly doubt it though.

This game is a pretty good entry in the Gen-san Harry series. In general, I think Hammerin’ Gen-san is pretty underrated and overlooked. Maybe it’s because it’s not as fast paced as other games and you need some good timing against some enemies?…

How old are Harry and his girlfriend anyways?… HMM…!

mystic

orbe

HeY gAmErS! FlareEX here, AKA the pudding prince of video games! Today I am bringing you the latest craze, one hell of an amazing game for the new Rumiko Takahashi’s DreamBoy console! I am of course talking about non other but the MMO title “Final Quest, Mystic Fantasy”!

Mystic 1.1 DONE!

While you do play as Mystic yet again, unlike in the previous entries, this time the developers decided to turn the main character into a girl! Boy oh boy oh man oh cold noodles oh my, ain’t them porn artist gonna break their hands on the rally to be first on posting their new art on the imageboards!

Pirate Cave DONE!

In “Final Mystic, Quest Fantasy”, playing as Mystic makes you FEEL like Mystic herself! The music is alright… and the graphics… … …

Tutorial. Oryx's Kitchen DONE!

The difficulty however is like nothing you’ve played EVER before! Here I was in the land of many sugar treats and bad dental hygiene, helpfully putting into statis every boss that spawned, inserting my dominance and ability to be an asshole in order to drive people away from the rare and item- rich dungeon, when suddenly, I got POPPED! I was fighting the pony boss and without it even moving, I received the death screen! This game takes things to the next level! It’s not longer about pure skill, it’s about predictions! This title is pretty much the Dark Noses of the game’s series! It also serves to show us what the future will look like! Why, games will be based on nothing more than predictions! After all, these are always the hottest topics in gaming forums as well! Everyone likes and wants to predict what a yet to be released game will be like, with of course, once released, said game usually ends up being a piece of shit, completely setting to ruin dreams all around. I for once cannot wait to one day receive an empty, plain box, so I can imagine what game could have been inside it and predict how would it have played AND how would I have played it!

Forest Maze DONE!

While I do LOVE this, it has its share of flaws all over the place! Unskippable cutscenes. Spam and bots. Lack of variety – Every dungeon in the game feels the same. The low amount of only 130 breathtaking music tracks. Complicated crafting system. Chat profanity protection. Two weeks bans for playing off meta. The last dungeon is literally unplayable without the involvement of microtransactions. Single player only.

I’m sorry but I’ll have to give this game a 96 out of 100…

Spider Den DONE!

 

bepis

 

The Legend of Princess – FAQ: #1: How to find the “Dirt Temple”? – Well you see, back when I was in high school… 1/589

princess legend

“The Legend of Princess” is supposed to be a parody game of a [certain] series, by Joakim Sandberg. The joke about it lies in the overall fact that nowadays you can take on a product that was shoved into people’s mouths for decades by a “really” important company, but make it way better in many aspects. Sometimes you’ve gotta watch it though, as a certain results may exceed the quality of the original product, leading to what we call a “Lonely Barbeque Party”. You should know when to turn the volume down, less you want to grab the attention of your whiny and jealous neighbours, who would call the police on your ass instantly! You don’t want that to happen, do you? DO YOU?

“The Legend of Princess” is quite the take when it comes to the platforming genre of said [certain] parodied series. It’s colorful and graphically pretty impressive, well animated and fairly entertaining for how short in terms of length it is. While you do get to explore only the classic “Dirt Temple” which is composed merely of a several rooms, the whole short experience is way worth your time. What with the responsive controls and being able to customize your equipment before the start of the game, with items varying from boring to awkward to use, this game really holds it up! The puzzles and the platforming sections felt pretty basic and a bit unsatisfying, but the boss battles really managed to fill up the holes. A mixture of puzzle and a drop of action, packed with a hue of pretty. That’s this game in a nutshell!

Legend of Princess DONE!

I mean, if you are a fan of [those] series, you are bound to have some good times, given how close this game parody tries to stay to the original, what with the characters, items and whatnot. Whether you decide to play it for some casual fun, high score or for the intention of an UNIQUE speedrun, 20 to 30 minutes of your life would be spent worthwhile. Hell, you might even want to play through the game with all the different item combinations! Short games with a decent variety, now that’s my JAM!

I personally give this an 8 out of 10!

Life of D. Duck – To Pat Oorridge and beyond!

d.duck

So what is it that makes a porridge so special?Well starting from the fact that it would never keep a track of your search and browsing history,a porridge is unlikely to make videos where it would scream at video game ghosts or for no reason whatsoever.Additional good trait for a porridge is that it doesn’t tend to be discriminative towards genders,not only because it lacks any,but because it’s a freakin’ porridge and it lacks sentience!

You can date a porridge,you can try to go all the way with it,but in the end,it won’t say a single word to you!Overall,you are a tool for the porridge!If the porridge can’t use you as a consumer,you are useless to the porridge.How would you feel if you went to bed without eating your porridge?Like,would you really consider going to sleep with the feeling of being worthless to a single bowl of porridge?

Let’s be real here!If there is a way for a person to reconnect once again with nature in these modern times,it will be more or less through porridge.The porridge will lead you to the heart of mother nature,reavealing you mysteries long forgotten alongside.It will also watch you as you are being completely obliterated by a wild,nuclear bear!

Porridge is pretty awesome!

Life of D. Duck DONE!

…and you know,in “Life of D. Duck” you get to make and eat porridge!With all the facts about porridge that we just went through,I am not really seeing any actual score that would fit with this great game!

..//

What do you mean you don’t know how to enlarge a .pdf so you can print it in larger format?Just follow the porridge’s instructions man!Don’t just get a tattoo at the age of sixteen at the local barber shop!Stay out of the soda hell located deep under the sea!

Abobo’s Big Adventure – Crush&Smash!Blood and gore are the core elements for a quality humor!

abobobo

I’ve never been a big fan of fan-made parody games as a whole.It’s probably due to the fact that they are usually poorly designed,they lack a substantial humor,gameplay and ARE usually Sonic games.What I really hate is the typical “Well,the game is badly made ‘cuz that’s part of the whole parody man!” That’s pretty much an excuse for not putting any effort into it and just trying to shove it up people’s faces and just get ’em spoils.[Like that’s the case only with parody games.Come on!]

Then…this game…Abobobo’s Big Adventure.It came out long ago…I still remember my reaction when I saw it… “DEAR GOD THIS IS AWESOME!” I remember my reaction when I saw it again days ago… “Oh…this game…” Big words upfront – This is probably one of the parody games that I’ve played and really enjoyed in my life.Not the best,but I would not mind to put it in top 10,who knows,maybe even 5.

you play as abobo from super mario triforce

It’s all about the way this game executes it’s contents.The animation and the art are top notch,if we take into consideration the whole idea behind the game itself.There are other games that tend to parody the NES era,but this one just…it really shines!THE PEOPLE WHO WORKED ON THIS WORKED HARD!The controls are quite smooth and they tend to live up to their original ideas,based on the levels of the game.As you go through them,you are in for a lot of nostalgia,enjoyment and original outlooks and ideas toward certain things/aspects.LOTS OF VARIETIES!The game is also pretty generous towards the player.Lots of lives,unlimited continues[?not really sure,I used it only once]…The overall diffuculty is around the average,maybe even a bit below.You also get to chase after medals/achievements.Want a bigger challange?Go for all of them!

Abobo done!

WHOA!SO MANY!AMAZING!OUTRAGEOUS!MARMALADE!

Plot is all over the place.Humor varies from “Meh…” to “Funnieh”.It can make you smile at least.I’m sure there are people out there who would laugh a lot,if not at least a bit.It’s overall enjoyable in terms of gameplay and atmosphere.

You also get some gore,cuz it’s Abobo and…the people who made the game choose it as an EXTRA SPICE!I like my foods with lots of spices.I ENJOY THEM WITH LOTS OF SPICES!This dish however…I think it could have been as good as it is without any additions,but you know…

I ain’t giving 7.3 out of 10 for nothing!

There are some dumb moments and [too forced] jokes.Is that even a thing?I don’t know.I don’t care!